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No Place Like Home

by DEADWEIGHT

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1.
Intro 01:04
Thank God I'll never see the day when I have to put my family in their graves, cause they've been dead to me since the day I was born, since the day that I'd sworn my life away. and I'm a free man, but don't ignore these chains cause I'm a servant and a slave just no longer to shame. and I'm a dead man, but don't ignore this heart cause it's still beating just not for a world that's tearing itself apart.
2.
I came into this world naked, but I won't leave it the same way you wrecked it. I don't know what in hell you expected to save you from yourself. I would rather die than to live for nothing lying in the grave knowing I stood for something bigger than myself or than I'll ever be. God save my soul from the American dream. So damn my pride and my family, and every single thing that's keeping you from me. I'd rather my hand sever the tree than for your axe to ever meet my complacency. Where you saw a cross I only saw a tree and where you saw grace I said well is there enough for a man like me for whore like me, a thief like me, for a wretch like me, for a swine like me? Even if I spent every dime I saved I could never pay back all the mistakes I've made and damn the day that I forgot that I need you because you're everything I'm not. God, (won't you) damn the American dream. To hell with the lies there is only one way, only one truth, only one life.
3.
And if I got everything I deserved I'd be thrown in hell my pedistool is on its last leg and I think you can tell that I'm as broken as the pieces that lying beneath my feet cause I'm a sinful wicked man so I hope you can see that I, am not your savior, I am not your God, and I could never turn around your life. and I, have never killed a man with my own two bare hands, but my tongue has sunk far too many ships on foreign lands. When I make it to heaven it won't be from what I've done cause the moon can only ever hope to reflect the son. but the son's already dead, we all want to survive, but it takes losing your entire life. and if you could only see everything I've done you'd see that cross wasn't option A, or option B it was the only one. desperate terrorist, in this wicked land this wicked age. mutilators, ripping the body, limb from limb. tearing the seams from every page over and over again.
4.
I'd give an arm and a leg just to see my others back well I may be left short handed, but at least I'm on a track and being pulled in two directions was never quite the plan the hardest thing I ever had to was understand that I don't always understand, but understand me when I say that no matter how wise I become I will never choose to follow my own way. even wisdom can be blinded by opening up the blinds to the light no matter how much I love you that will never mean that you're always right. I've checked my ears for 20 years, but never have I heard the thoughts of imperfection overcoming a perfect word. and now I'm disturbed because those that I love are pulling me apart one tells me to pray for change while the other's already changed my heart. and I see your good intentions, I know you just want me to grow but is it fair to count a garden non existent just because it is one you've yet to know. I've seen a side of life that comfort can not show I've seen a side of life that my flesh alone could never know I've seen a side of life that's taken me giving up everything I've ever owned. everything I owned. I've always wanted you to see my capabilities, to be something more and do nothing less, than what it takes to make you see my love, my father is all I need.
5.
The axe is to the roots with murder coursing through our bones we bought our tickets to heaven, but claimed it as our own. we spent our years living in fear instead of he in us cause we'll drink the wine and break the bread but throw away the crust. we say amen time and time again, following the god of the latest trend wondering why we are still controlled by sin, asking only ourselves what it was God meant when he said repent. and they said take back your life, but was it ever yours? and I swore that I'd die if that's what it'd take for your heart/life to be pure. and if mere water could save our souls I would have been made whole 20 years ago, I repented I turned around thinking these 360s would lead me to his crown, but I'm no longer looking down cause I discovered that I was already found. so are we just waiting to die without a reason, without purpose. the axe is to the root with murder coursing through our bones, under the skin. cause at the end of the day we're all hypocrites lying in the same grave. we've all got the same scars burned in by different mistakes. and if we never look past where we've been, we'll never make it anywhere my dearest friend. if we can't look past the depths of our own skin.
6.
I'm not afraid to face the consequences for what I've done but for every single time that I decided to run rather than stay rather than pray. My hands are sleeping in my pockets thinking I can deal with it another day. And I'm so sick of being stuck on every single lesson you teach wisdom can only go as far as a man's willing to seek. And the worst part is that I never stopped seeing you I just lost sight of the man whose only question was who he should be and where I should go to hell with every road that doesn't lead to home. I never doubted you cared or even that you were there I just got sick of going back on every time that I'd swear that I would be a better son . That you were proud to show the devil like Job or close clothe a man like Joseph in redeeming robes. That you were proud to send to the Lions Den or to four brick walls they never prayed would cave in because the point was never the pain or feeling alright but living in full confidence I'm living in life himself and that I am loved by love and I am saved by grace the man that I once was won't be the one to see your face now on the day I die the day that I come home I've seen my father's vision and he is not alone. I would sail across world and every sea you made with your two hands as long as I could sleep in them too even the creases will do cause there's no place like home when I am living in you. I would give up ever holding my son or teaching my daughter how to walk. I would cut apart my family tree just to carve it into a cross. I would leave behind my mind for every single hopeless time that I thought you were worth anything less. I would cut out my right eye just to keep my left from going blind father feel free to take whatever you want because none of its mine. And never will I look back and regret what I've left behind because when I look at you I found the only one that's ever been worth my time.

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released November 18, 2014

Engineered, mixed, and mastered by Simon P. at www.facebook.com/darkeneddreamsar?ref=br_tf in Sherwood, AR.

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